Differences this go round

There is some definite change and difference between this pregnancy and the one I had with Owen. This time I kind of know what to expect, and what feels "normal". I am not as anxious or jumpy over everything. I don't call my OB for every twinge or problem, but wait it out if it's minor or I can handle it. I don't have a linea negra this time - or at least not yet. I haven't started leaking milk yet, which started at 24w with Owen. I also am not swollen and my BP is great. I feel sick most days this time, where I felt great with Owen the entire pregnancy.

The biggest difference this time is my emotions. I am so not ready for this baby girl to get here. I have less than 11 weeks to go and I know it will fly by, as most of this pregnancy has. I couldn't wait to hold O, see what he would look like, give birth and get on with it, and now I want her to stay in for as long as she can so I can have time. We have nothing done, the nursery is a mess, I have not bought her any clothes other than a couple little onesies, we have no name and feel unprepared. But totally prepared at the same time because we know what to do with a newborn this time. We know how to change diapers, we are armed with ten different ways to soothe her if she gets reflux and colic. I know that every little whimper doesn't mean I have to drop everything and be by her side constantly.

My anxiety level is different this time, and I am more anxious for Owen and how he will adjust and deal with having a baby in the house than I am about having this baby. I worry about our little family changing, and sometimes wonder what we were thinking having another one when life is so good for us as a family of three. But I know she will make us change for the better and fill out our family. It is very different being pregnant this time, and I can't wait to see how different life will be as a family of 4.